I hate being this disgusting halfway thing. Compared to a man I’m disgustingly weak and effeminate and obviously different to the point where i can’t even manmode now if i wanted to. Like it’d be more effort than it’s worth and everyone would still clock me as a pathetic faggot so it’s not like i’d even get anything out of it besides an uptick in suicidal ideation.

But compared to a woman I am unmistakably something else. I have long hair and male skin. I have the height and frame of a man with two malformed lumps of flesh on my chest one might mistake for breasts if they were squinting at night and drunk. i have the quintessential clocky [] voice that’s just barely 51% female and only 49% male. I am a creature of the uncanny valley. I have estrogenated myself beyond the point of no return, in shooting for the stars i’ve stranded myself on a mountain. fmstl.